Perhaps a bit sassy, maybe a little naughty, Urban Lacquer's theme this year is centered around the male member. Five polishes, each named after a slang term for the word ‘penis’. Each polish even has its own pair of balls; an old-school style (but brand new) ponytail holder tied around the cap!
LET THE FUN BEGIN.
“One-Eyed Dragon: He sees youuuuuuuu. One-Eyed Dragon is a stunning green / blue multichrome nail polish. This color-shifter will show off hues of bright green, then shift to a metallic green with deep blue accents, and sometimes you'll see a more subdued teal color, depending on the lighting! And, just to keep things interesting, each bottle of One-Eyed Dragon will have a black & white googly eye attached to the top of the bottle cap, because, well, I couldn't resist. Not your typical Valentine's Day polish - this one is a great gift for the non-comformist woman.
Unbelievable Polish. One-Eyed Dragon wowed me as soon as I started stroking the brush across my nails. The shimmer in this was flashing and sparkling like disco lights in a dance club! And oh, that first coat was nearly opaque, but two covered all areas nicely.
Then it happened, I moved my hand ever so slightly and the color changed, I pulled my hand back even more and it shifted again and again and again! YES!
Colors like a peacock, I could see every single shade! From the iridescent shimmery grey of their body to the beautiful green/turquoise/blue shifting feathers and there's even a bit of purple in dimmer lighting. Its stunning, jaw dropping, gorgeous and definitely unique!
If you can only get one from this collection, this is it. The must have, don't miss it, gift one to your bestie, get a back up or ten, omg polish of...EVER!
It is a masterpiece.
I've shot One Eyed Dragon in a few different light situations and angles to try and show off that shift. The first three images are under my usual lighting set up.
The following images are under bright light, dim light and some are backlit.
“Doinker. I could say this word all day long. Try using it as an adjective; you won't be disappointed. Doinker is a stunning mix of blue and green glitters, including 3 types of stars - neon green, turquoise, and black, in a clear base, accented with silver holo dust. The majority of the stars are neon green, followed by turquoise, and finally, there is a light sprinkling of black stars in each bottle.
One coat of Doinker will do her! Very easy to apply, jam packed with glitter and mostly smooth after topcoat. I did add an extra coat of gelous and topcoat, since the stars tend to want to poke out. I adore the color combination and it works perfectly layered over One-Eyed Dragon, don't ya think?
“Schlong is a medium blue linear holographic nail polish. It's a lovely shade of blue, between cornflower & steel blue, leaning more towards cornflower. I believe it's the prettiest schlong I've ever seen.
A blue lover's dream color, smallish particle size so you get a vibrant rainbowy bend and holo amazingness, smooth gliding application and opaque in one thick coat. What more could you ask for in a Schlong? (omg did I just say that?!)
“Magic Wand is comprised of pink, purple, iridescent, and white glitter in a clear base. It sparkles with a lavender/pink iridescent sheen. I love adding iridescence to clear bases, as when it's worn over a base color, it will slightly change the hue of the base, and this polish is no exception. Magic Wand is truly striking, on trend with its Radiant Orchid-hued glitters, and a perfect gift for those who love more traditional Valentine's Day colors.
I layered Magic Wand over Schlong and the combo is breathtaking! I didn't expect such a lovely result and gasped when I saw it. There's just something about the coolness of blue under a hot bold pink that's soothing yet exciting at the same time! Magic Wand is glitter packed so I only used one coat here with a few coats of top coat to smooth it out. In the macro image the tiny shimmer that Brenda describes can be seen on top of the white rectangle, love it!
“Of course I had to include a meat reference in this collection. Sorry, vegetarians. Bologna Pony is a bright, creamy, coral crelly nail polish. This coral leans more orange than pink - it's like mango-flavored* latex for your nails. It is opaque in 2-3 coats, depending on application technique. When I wear this polish, I apply 2 generous coats, and just touch up the areas where I see VNL (visible nail line). An awesomely bright color that will transition beautifully into spring!
***IMPORTANT note about Bologna Pony: This polish shares the same pink pigment used in my Baby Cake nail polish, therefore you will experience temporary nail staining with this polish. Please be advised of this, before purchasing Bologna Pony.***
I had a lot of fun planning out nail art to go with my Bologna Pony mani! I purposely used my middle "naughty" finger for the accent nail by adding a delicious sunrise gradient and topping it with a cock, er...rooster, spangle.
My "Cock On The Rise" is pretty clever, yeah?
Bologna Pony is super squishy looking and after topcoat its very shiny like latex!
Jas' contribution to my Cock on the Rise mani was citing a quote for me from a Cormac McCarthy book, so I had to include it.
“They rode on and the sun in the east flushed pale streaks of light and then a deeper run of color like blood seeping up in sudden reaches flaring planewise and where the earth drained up into the sky at the edge of creation the top of the sun rose out of nothing like the head of a great red phallus until it cleared the unseen rim and sat squat and pulsing and malevolent behind them.
The Members Only polishes will be available along with other Urban Lacquer polishes on Wednesday, February 5 at 8:00pm, central time.
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I hope you've enjoyed the read and/or the photos. It was a lot of fun to put this blog entry together. Please visit me again and and bring your friends!